I am the 5th of seven children of an Irish Catholic family, born in
Pittsburgh, Pa. My parents insisted we all attend church, even though they never did. I attended catechism classes, went to confession, and attended mass every Sunday and Holy Day. After moving to Hagerstown in 1962, I became an altar boy and later filled in as an usher. Soon the parish priest started taking an interest in me. He befriended me when it seemed I had no other friends.

The priest used what I had been confessing to him to his advantage. I was a naïve teen, and slowly and methodically, the priest seduced me into his sick and perverted world. I felt this wasn't right, but the priest insisted that we were developing a Godly relationship. I felt totally powerless to prevent or stop what was happening. I couldn't tell anyone. Who would believe me over this priest who was so highly regarded? I don't remember how long it took until I was finally able to put a stop to it. I still couldn't tell anyone though. I still had to attend church, but I couldn't be an altar boy or an usher. I couldn't go to confession or receive communion. Left to myself, I began to grow very bitter, and hatred festered. A couple months after turning 18, I walked away from the church wondering why my God had let this happen; blaming Him, the church and, most of all, the priest. I was on my own. Who needed church or religion? I could still believe in God and just do my own thing.

I started smoking and drinking beer. After high school graduation in 1973, I went into the Marine Corps. I started drinking heavier; getting into hard liquor. Just a couple of weeks after arriving for my technical schooling, I was called home for my father's funeral. Afterwards, I drank even harder, to the point I had black-outs. This was a lonely time. I was engaged to my girlfriend, but separated from her. I still didn't have God in my life or believe I needed Him. When I was stationed in Japan, I was diagnosed as an alcoholic. When I received a "Dear John" letter from my fiancée, my drinking only got worse, and I went through one immoral relationship after another.

Returning to the states in late 1975, I found myself lonelier than ever before. I was still smoking and drinking, and I was deep into pornography. I began an immoral relationship with an 18 year old girl that ended up in a whirlwind marriage, a daughter being born, and then divorce. Prior to the birth of my daughter, out of concern for her, I put down the alcohol and have been sober since.

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